January-February 2005
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Reviewed by Lynne Lamberg |
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It takes plenty of chutzpah to call yourself "The Sleep Lady," when you lack formal training in sleep medicine. Kim West, however, has made it her trademark name. A clinical social worker and mother of two who lives near Annapolis, Md., she's built a career helping parents improve their children's sleep. West explains her philosophy and offers step-by-step guidelines for parents of newborns to five-year-olds in this comprehensive book, produced with help from journalist Joanne Kenen, a former client. "The ability to sleep is a learned skill," West observes. "All children can learn it. All parents can teach them. But, like everything else in life, some just need a little more help than others." With regard to babies, "I won't promise no tears but I do aim for fewer tears," West says. "I never tell you to just shut the door and let your baby bawl alone in the dark." With that assertion, West jumps into the highly polarized "cry it out" debate. She implies it's callous to allow a baby to cry for even a few minutes after being put to bed. Some sleep specialists contend this tactic, used in a systematic way, with parents providing periodic reassurance, can help a baby who is six months old or older learn self-comforting tactics that ease the transition from waking to sleep. West claims her approach, which she calls "the Sleep Lady Shuffle," improves a child's sleep in a more gentle way within a couple of weeks. She encourages parents to stay by the bed as the baby falls asleep, and then, after a few days, gradually extricate themselves from the room. She suggests parents start using her routine when the baby is about six months old. West recommends putting the baby to bed drowsy but awake, just as most sleep professionals do. After giving the baby a favorite blanket or soft toy, the parent or other caregiver sits nearby to provide comfort and reassurance. Every three days, the adult moves a little further from the crib, across the room, to the doorway, and out in the hall, still offering soothing words to let the baby know someone's there. As the distance increases, West says, babies will learn to soothe themselves, sucking a finger, or snuggling against the blanket or toy. At the same time, they remain confident that mom or dad is nearby. West advises parents to use the Shuffle at bedtime, for middle-of-the-night awakenings, and often for naps, too. The routine evolves as children get older; West provides details in age-specific chapters. The Shuffle is only one part of a wide-ranging program that involves attention to mealtimes, play, and other daily routines. West encourages parents to tailor her guidelines to fit their family's needs. In her practice, West usually works with only about five families at a time. Her counseling services include approximately 15-minute morning phone conversations to review the previous night's efforts, and encourage parents to stick with the program. While calls taper off after two or three weeks, she stays in touch by email for several months. In her book, she encourages readers to partner with a friend whose child is the same age, exchange morning phone calls, and create an ongoing support system. Elsewhere in the book, West reviews sleeping arrangements for twins and siblings, naps in day care centers, and the debate over allowing children to share their parents' bed. She tells how to manage sleep disruption caused by travel, illness, daylight saving time changes, and other temporary events. She discusses nightmares, sleepwalking, sleep terrors, and bedwetting, and describes illnesses that may disrupt a child's sleep such as asthma, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, and sleep apnea. With clear, lively prose, and many examples, this book conveys support and encouragement throughout. Parents will benefit from reading and rereading it over the first five years of their child's life. |
© 2005 WebSciences and Lynne Lamberg |
GOOD NIGHT, SLEEP TIGHT: